


Proximity

by dearfriendicanfly



Category: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Pining, Unrequited Love, or so jaeha thinks anyway but he is a Fool bc hak has two hands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-24 11:37:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15629916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dearfriendicanfly/pseuds/dearfriendicanfly
Summary: It’s almost intoxicating, this back and forth within himself of whether or not to bridge the gap. The sense of proximity only makes him long to be closer,closer.





	Proximity

It’s the proximity, Jae-ha thinks sometimes. He should be used to it by now. Yona’s little troop has been traveling together for nearly a year by now, sleeping rough every night – but it’s not so rough when you have a chorus of snores and soft sighs in your ears and someone clinging to your arm like a little kid and someone else splayed over you like another little kid but without any concept of personal space. It’s annoying, it’s familiar, it’s warm. It’s something Jae-ha’s always been used to, growing up in the belly of a pirate ship with a crew so big and rowdy it’s a miracle they all fit in their bunks. It’s hard for Jae-ha to think of a time he ever slept alone.

And yet, sometimes the closeness is enough to make him shiver, to send gooseflesh down the back of his neck. He feels that now, with Hak breathing deep and slow beside him, pressed against the warmth of his arm. The night is cold, but Jae-ha feels heat prickling at his skin. 

“Are you gonna sleep anytime soon or just stare at me all night, droopy eyes?” It’s dark, but Jae-ha can see Hak’s eyes glinting in the night.

“Can you blame me for enjoying the view?”

“In pitch dark?”

Jae-ha chuckles, pressing a little closer into Hak’s side. Kija stirs on his other side, but rolls over, curling up closer to Shin-ah instead. “It’s hard to sleep with such a beauty right next to me, you know. My heart’s all a flutter.” He’s only half joking.

Hak clicks his teeth, giving Jae-ha a halfhearted kick in the shin. “Shut up and sleep you idiot, you’re too full of holes to be such a smartass. You’d be back on your feet by now if you’d quit wasting all your energy on running your mouth.”

“Oh, is that worry I hear? That’s sweet of you, Hak dear.”

Hak closes his eyes, and Jae-ha can actually hear his teeth grinding. “King Il, give me the strength not to kill him myself.”

Jae-ha’s shoulders shake as he tries not to laugh out loud. “All right, all right, I yield. I’ll go to sleep. You oughta rest too, you know. I’m not the only one full of holes.”

“’M fine,” Hak mutters gruffly. “It’s a lot easier to treat an arrow wound than some… astral projection… dragon shit. Whatever the hell that was.”

Jae-ha considers a retort, but thinks better of it. Hak has a point. Even Jae-ha still isn’t sure what kind of effects he might have to deal with in the future just from the one incident.

The thought makes his heart sink strangely. He rolls over a little, and Hak’s warmth disappears. “No need to worry about that,” he says lightly, almost sing-song. “We’ll be back to normal once we’re closer to Hiryuu castle.”

Hak doesn’t respond, but Jae-ha can see his eyes glinting in the dark again. For some reason, he thinks Hak wants to say something. But it’s quiet except for soft, slow breaths and the sound of crickets coming from the hills. 

Suddenly, he feels Hak shifting beside him, and then another blanket is tucked around his shoulders. “What are you–”

“You’re shivering,” Hak says flatly. “Still anemic, probably. Quit being a dumbass and say something if you’re cold.”

Jae-ha isn’t sure how to admit that it’s not the cold making him shiver.

“What about you?” Jae-ha asks instead. “Aren’t you cold?”

“What, you’re not gonna share?”

Jae-ha’s breath catches in his throat. “Ah,” he says weakly.

Hak pulls the blankets gently over his own shoulders, his back pressing heavily into Jae-ha’s side. Jae-ha goes still, his breath suddenly silent. The heat that sent pinpricks across his skin before now crackles like lightning.

“Now get some sleep.”

“Now you’re just teasing me,” Jae-ha complains, his voice coming out more hoarse than he intended.

Hak laughs this time, low and gravelly, and Jae-ha can feel the way it rumbles in Hak’s chest where his arm is pressed against his back. “You wish.”

Someone suddenly clears their throat, making them both jump. “For the love of god will you both please shut the hell up?” Yoon’s voice hisses.

Neither of them say a word after that.

Eventually, Hak’s breaths slow into snores, his back expanding against Jae-ha’s side with each one. He can’t see him in the dark, but he can feel the weight and the warmth of him, and Jae-ha is almost sure that the sound of his heart must be loud enough to wake the whole camp. 

He wants to reach out and touch him.

_ Don’t be an idiot _ , Jae-ha thinks, but he still lets his mind wander as he thinks what it would be like to run his fingers through Hak’s hair, or trail a finger along the back of his neck and see if it made him shudder. 

He considers reaching out to hold his hand. No one in the group is particularly shy about holding hands anymore; Jae-ha’s woke up plenty of times to find Yoon holding his hand close to him in his sleep like a child with a doll, or Zeno’s fingers brushing against his like a reassurance. None of them would bat an eye at it. And yet the thought of running his fingertips over the callouses on Hak’s palm makes Jae-ha shiver.

It’s almost intoxicating, this back and forth within himself of whether or not to bridge the gap. The sense of proximity only makes him long to be closer,  _ closer _ . He lets himself get lost in what-ifs and if-onlys and presses his forehead between Hak’s shoulder blades, trying to calm his heart. By the time he finally drifts off to sleep and dreams of rough, calloused hands tangled in his hair, the sun has begun to rise.

When Jae-ha wakes up, Hak is gone, but he thinks the blankets are tucked a little more tightly around his shoulders.

**Author's Note:**

> just a little drabble thats been sitting around unposted for like... months skdjghk anyway jaeha makes me emo.
> 
> as always, kudos and comments are appreciated more than words can say!! <3


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